![]() ![]() NC: I love this weird point he does, too. (The second boy also bites down on his cereal, crunching.) Mario: Give me a crunch! (One of the boys bites down hard on the cereal, making a loud crunch.) One more. (One of the boys is shown creepily staring toward the cereal box with DK throwing pieces of the cereal down to Mario like barrels while holding Pauline captive.) He's sitting there, like, "One day, that chunk of ass will be mine. (The two boys in the commercial are eagerly biting down hard on the cereal.) Check out the psycho eyes on this one. NC (vo): My favorite thing about this commercial actually isn't the cereal mascots, but the strange kids eating the cereal. NC: How do you always somehow make me hate Donkey Kong?! He is about to eat some of it when he looks up and spots who else but Billy Mitchell staring at him. (NC is seen with a bowl of the cereal in his hand. NC (vo): It's so authentic, Billy Mitchell smugly judges you while you eat it! (An image of Billy Mitchell is shown.) NC: We haven't cleared it with legal yet, but we're sure it's fine.Īnnouncer: And, boy, is it fun to crunch! NC (vo as announcer): Every box comes free with an abducted woman. Pauline: (held captive by DK) Help, help! (Images of those two aforementioned characters are shown.)Ĭommercial Announcer: Donkey Kong-brand cereal has a sweet, crunchy corn taste. (This early version of Mario is shown, along with a shot of the modern Mario off to the side.) Meaning the plumber's iconic design looked more like Popeye if you threw him in the wash with the Pringles guy. NC (vo): Yes, Donkey Kong used to be the gaming hotshot before Mario. ♫ (Pauline falls as well, but Mario catches her in his arms) Donkey Kong Cereal! ![]() (DK, who holds Pauline in his arm, climbs to the top of the cereal box, but Mario whacks the box with a hammer, causing DK to lose his footing and fall off the cereal, landing on his head, knocking himself out.) NC (vo): Well, this cereal immediately seems unhygienic. Two boys are pouring out a box of Donkey Kong Cereal, a product of Ralston Purina, with the characters of Mario, Donkey Kong and Pauline, in cartoon form, all coming out of the box as well.) (TV static transition to: Donkey Kong Crunch commercial. ![]()
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